Vista Valley PTA (1981)

July 4, 2014 by adamsunderground

Censored Trailer

Anarchy abounds at Vista Valley High School, the scene of two female teacher rapes at the hands of their own students and a male teacher’s beating by teenage cocks. That perpetrator appendage order may have been reversed in all the mayhem. Regardless, the clueless school district has sent the school aid in the svelte shape of Miss Martin, a no-nonsense blonde bombshell who teaches English, promising to train the students with a whimsy that is near Teutonic. After evaluating the juvenile delinquents in her charge, she immediately calls a conference with their parents to remedy the misbehavior, unaware that Vista Valley has its own way of conflict deliverance. Thankfully, Ned Beatty’s squeals are nowhere to be found in this lurid suburb.

Stock image of Juliet Anderson by Denise LaFrance the Painter, via Flickr

It is a simple parody tale, inspired by the hit song about small town hypocrisy, Harper Valley PTA, and purportedly based upon the crusading teacher trope. However, the protagonist Miss Martin is almost absent from the script altogether, with the intended heroine an afterthought bookending the vignettes that reveal Vista Valley families’ sexual mischief. Some good dialogue aids this story’s overall cohesion problem, along with solid acting performances, especially in chaste scenes with some genuine humor. In the sex situations no serendipity strikes, as the average and unsubtle performances among the younger actresses fail to match the quality of their elders, Juliet Andrews and Kay Parker.

Original Theme Song

Inventive camera work ably captures Desiree West’s brief cameo appearance, a good example showing the film crew’s attention to maintaining the audience’s, along with the random nudity sprinkled throughout the story.

Few people will find major fault with this film, as it has overall high production values and a fair story balanced with entertainingly good and bad acting.


by dBnetco, via Flickr

AU Score
Total Grade: B
Specialty Grade
Screenplay B
Acting C
Cinematography A
Film Editing B
Visual Effects C
Audio B
Sound Editing C
Audio Effects C
Musical Score B
Production Design A


Adults Only


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